Thursday, May 22, 2008

Jungle Mom for President

As many of you may recall, I did announce my candidacy for the office of President of the United States of America a while back. I even laid out my party platform. However, I did not announce my running mate at that time.

I have been neglecting my campaign as I watch the dems attack each other! So fun to watch!!!

I now make it official, there will be two Mr. Clintons in this election. One unofficially as the "First Spouse" and my own hubby, Ye'kwanaman,, also know as Clinton, as my VP running mate!!!

He lived in a White House, in the jungle, for over ten years so I feel this makes him ready to lead on day one!

If ( dare I say when?) elected, I will be naming like minded people as my Cabinet, many of whom you know via this blog.

Department of Agriculture, none other than 'Humble Wife' of pen of jen and Double Nickel Farm!

Department of Interior, our very own, Mike's America!

Department of Commerce Joe Gringo !

Department of Justice, The Local Malcontent ( He will also cover Indian Affairs)

Department of Defense, The Hermit

Department of Labor , The Sikorski Family! ( Any woman who as given birth five times and is ready to do it again soon, knows all about labor!!!)

Department of Education, Garbanzo Toons ( He has a teacher's heart and cares for his students!)

Department of State, John!

Department of Energy, Webutante !

Department of Treasury, American !

Department of Veteran Affairs, Redneck Preacher!

Department of Homeland Security, Llano Estacado ( also known as Rancher)

Department of Housing and Urban Development, I plan to eliminate this one!
( If you want to own a house, work hard and pay for it!!!)


Humble wife said...

I humbly accept, as long as I am allowed to assist in the deconstruction of HUD.

You have my vote, although I am a tad bit squeamish about another *Clinton* in the White House!!!!

Pen of Jen
Double Nickel Farm

Yekwana Man said...

I am your man! Literally.

Webutante said...

This is the cutest and cleverest idea I've ever're elected and I accept with pleasure whatever the job may entail!!

Keep on keeping on, m'dear!

Jonn Lilyea said...

OK, I'll be Secretary of State if I can work from home because Foggy Bottom is too far from the Metro Station and too close to GWU.

But you had my vote before you named me to anything. You can't be worse than the choices we have now.


You have my vote!!! connie from Texas

Joe Gringo said...

I'm honored! ;-)

Promoting job creation and economic development is a capitalists dream.....but I'd have to shrink this outfit first!

Mike's America said...

I thank you for nominating me as Secretary of the Interior.

But before I can accept we will have to win 60 seats in the Senate controlled by Senators that support your platform.

Otherwise, I doubt they would confirm me.

The Localmalcontent said...

Yours, Madam President-elect, is the only candidacy I can endorse!

And yes, I will serve gladly, as your Attorney General... I can't wait to issue my first writ of Habeaus Corpusul! (Windows Media player req'd.)

Jungle Mom said...

LOL! that was great!!!!!

redneck preacher said...

Thank you and I will gladly accept.

The first thing I will do is to untie the hands of the Marines in Berkeley CA. Code Pink has a parking spot in front of the USMC recruiter. Let them keep it and share it with a Marine tank. I would suggest military recruiters be allowed to recruit on every campus that accepts federal money. No recruiter equals no money.

The very sad thing about this whole playful scenario is Jungle mom is infinitely more qualified to be the President than any of the dweebs running now.



Mountain Mama said...

Great idea!! Sounds fun and most likely more efficient that what may be in our future.

Findalis said...

You have my vote if I can be the US Ambassador to Israel. They need an ambassador that is a friend.

Happymama said...

HEY! You forgot Department of Court Jester. Oh, wait! The dems haven't made that decision yet, have they?



Pat said...

I know you are well versed on the issues and global affairs!

You are probably more abreast of current events, too. and, with your global knowlege and support, you are a shoo in!!

Love the Clinton idea!LOL

Dawn said...

You are a hoot. And I can tell we are kindred spirits. I have been a staunch Republican since I was a young girl. I actually thought I would run for office someday.

You and your husband definitely have my vote!!

Harry said...

I humbly accept your offer. This does mean a raise, right? I mean, I need the money to buy vo- uh, that is, to campaign for you.

theotherryan said...

OH OH MOM! Can I head the ATF? I promise to have at least a gallon of assorted booze and a 12 pack of beer,a carton of smokes and a roll of chew, and not less then 2 guns at all times. The main role I will have would be to educate people to not handle guns when drinking. Other then that I willl just hang out with people who like these three things chill out.I will need to arrest noone unless that person handles guns while drinking. No Waco on this mans watch.

Pam said...

Very Cleverly done my dear! I can see how each blogging friend would fit well into their given roles

One question, where might I (your sister) fit in for your illustrious administration? Might I be the chamber maid of your perhaps your personal secretary? Or how about Official White House Interior Decortor? I hsve the perfect position for my hubby, White House Chef!

MightyMom said...

well, obviously yekwana man is highly qualified for this office....but can't I ride your coattails in there somewhere?? advisor maybe??

Thriver said...

HAHA! I'll vote for you. Even though I'm a nothing.
Actually I'm the Official Unofficial Secretay

Pilot-Pooja said...

cool post!!

I will always vote for you!!!!!

Jungle Mom said...

pilot pooja, maybe you can be ambassador to India?

Kate said...

WOW, you have my vote, JM! :)

gecko said...

You sure can have my vote!! Love your candidate selection :)

jm, do you have an email addy?, mine is on my home page, would love a chat....

Gayle said...

LOL! Rita, you are such a treat!

"If you want to own a house, work hard and pay for it!" Far to many people will find that to be a very radical concept. Be careful, they may think you're crazy! :)

Rancher said...

Well if you are going to eliminate HUD then I’m glad you you’ve given me a job as I will no longer have tenants to pay my mortgages. My only qualifications are 5 years in security, (prison guard), CERT certified by Homeland Security, trained in NIMS, and three years as the Emergency Preparedness trainer. Not much but better than some.

First, secure the borders, north and south, as well as the East and West Coasts and our seaports and airports. Sorry, but we need a national ID card. We will track every foreigner be they quest workers, legal aliens or tourists. If we have to get Federal Express to do it, it will be done. We have to continue the Patriot Act, which has yet to violate any American’s rights to date. We must continue the terrorists surveillance programs. Keep Gitmo. Be vigilant of the net, not just from cyber attacks but also Jihadi blogs that are growing exponentially, glorifying murder and recruiting like mad. Monitor extremists Mosques; sermons, teachings, and accompanying literature. Likewise monitor racist supremacist and cult leaders.

Now when Obama gets elected, expect the opposite of everything I’ve advocated. Oh well, country boy will survive, as will JM and the rest of the gang.

Pilot-Pooja said...

Thank you so much Rita for offering me an amazing post!!

I like politics!

Charles said...

After ten days of careful consideration involving the flip of a coin. And believe me proper coin selection was a must. The out come of the toss with a final 65 out of 100 times. Was that YES I should follow the guidance provided by the left hand vrs right hand in a rousing round of rock, paper, scissors.

Any way after looking at the clouds in the sky, the shape of the ant mounds and the thickness of my mental fog at 3 am. I'd like to ...........ta da

Throw my interestingly odd hat in the ring and offer my unique services as National Court Jester

I may be reached between the hours of 10am Zulu and 10:01 Zulu daily except week days and obviously weekends since I have those days off. I am certain I shall hear from you within the next few days, because time is flying, and this afternoon..... So am I since we finally got the fuel tank replaced. Joy Joy !!